Need something completely unnecessary to blow your cash on?

Yes!? 

Then you’ve come to the right place.  I was meandering through the strange “Seen it on TV” section at my local Walgreen’s and spotted about a million items that I was halfway tempted to blow my cash on.  And then I came to and realized that 99.99999% of these products would be used once and then get stashed under my bed until I moved to my next place.  Then I’d pull out said item and get all excited about it because I do in fact remember ‘seeing it on TV,’ use said item one more time, realize it was shit and attempt to pawn it off on an innocent suspect or throw it away. 

It’s a process I’ve obviously been through before…

You’ve all heard of the Snuggie right?  It’s a glorified blanket.  Their catch is that it has arm holes to keep your hands free.  Because we all know how restricting those damn Afghans can be.  I can never get to the remote or take a drink of water under those things.  You can purchase the Adult Snuggie and a Kid’s Snuggie. 

And now……you can purchase the Dog Snuggie. 

Yes…a snuggie for your dogs.  Pretty dang ridiculous huh? 

wow...

Now…me being the extreme pet lover that I am-I actually thought the pictures on the box were freakin’ adorable.  But…I would never waste my money on it. 

I also particularly love how the box says, “Keeps your paws free!”  As if the dogs are the ones making this purchase.  And all dogs know how restricting regular blankets can be.  So stupid…although Hurley would look adorable in one. 

🙂 

PLSF

Mousey

Do you ever feel like your life is like that of a mouse.  Always running, but never really getting anywhere?

"Squeak"

Oh….no?   

Me neither… 

J

*PS:  still no Internet.  Yeah-I’m ready to bring the pain

Pile of Kittens!!!!!

Here’s a lovely gallery of some baby kitties. 

Seriously….nothing makes me happier then a pile of kittens. 

These kitties were born in a barn at our house in Michigan.  I mothered them and gave them food and water and petted them for a couple months and then found homes for all of them! 

My Mom has one of them (one of the orange ones) and she’s the cutest cat ever!!! 

I thought you might enjoy a bundle of kitties…

Click on a particular pic to see a larger version. 

Meow!

J

I’m Going to Kill Her!!!

And by her, I mean the cat.  Our cat, Master Chief.  Our beautiful cat that we so kindly adopted in January. 

Master Chief (Chief, Chiefy, Chiefers, MC, Kitty, Kit Kat, etc.)

Mew

She is a very pretty cat.  But don’t let her good looks fool you.  She has like bi-polar disorder or something.  She loves being petted (pet?) and then suddenly she will snap.  She will claw and bite at you even though she was just enjoying her tummy rub 2 seconds ago.  I don’t get it.  Maybe she’s ticklish or something?  Maybe she’s evil.  I’m going with the latter. 

We adopted her from the Houston SPCA.  She’s about 2 or 3 years old and according to her cage tag she was given to the shelter because the previous owners couldn’t afford her.  I will agree that pets can be a bit expensive, but seriously…a cat?  Once they have their initial shots and get the spay/neuter surgery they are pretty cheap animals to keep.  You have to buy food and litter but that’s about it.  Now that we’ve really gotten to know the cat, I now realize that the previous owners were lieing.  They could afford her.  They just didn’t want her.  Because she’s evil! 

This became very prevalent the other night.  I wanted to drop kick her into next week.  As you know, I started my new job on Monday.  I went to bed a little early hoping for a wonderful full night of sleep in the hopes of being ‘bright eyed and bushy tailed’ for my first day on the new job. 

Didn’t happen. 

The cat sat outside our bedroom door any meowed.  All night long. 

Before we adopted Hurley, the cat used to sleep on the bed at night.  Calmly and quietly.  After we got Hurley we had to lock her out of bedroom and keep him in the bedroom to avoid having them chase each other during our sleepy time.  So I can sorta feel her pain.  We kicked her out of the bedroom and moved the dog in. 

Last night she howled and meowed and made all sorts of noise all night long.  She has done this before but the cause was usually an empty food bowl.  After getting rudely awoken from my slumber two or three times, I finally dragged my butt out of bed to see if an empty food bowl was the cause of the problem.  Nope.  Food bowl=full.  I went back to bed.  And she was back at it.  Meow.  Meow.  Meow.  Meoooooooooowwww. 

I think I woke up to her meowing about 10 times!!!!  It was brutal and I wanted to kill her.  But I felt bad as I’m really a lover of all animals. 

I’m not really sure what the cause of her meowing was but I have a feeling it was the fact that she was yearning for some affection as we had just returned from a weekend trip.  She was home alone from Thursday morning to Sunday afternoon.  She needed some serious lovin.’  Poor thing.

I’m going to pet her 30 times before I go to bed from now on.  Or else she may just end up back at the shelter.  Kidding…  😉 

T found this video of a pestering cat that I want to share.  I swear the cat doesn’t sit still for more than a minute or two the entire night.  It made me laugh!   

This guy probably kicked the cat out of the bedroom but it wouldn’t stop meowing so he had to let it back in.  Felines are smarter then the average pet. 

P.S.  I had a WONDERFUL first day on the new job.  I didn’t do much, but the normal first day stuff.  Setting up my laptop, getting a phone, meeting some peeps, etc.  But it was cool and I’m excited to get started in my new position! 

Happy Tuesday!

J

Treat Jar

I bought this canister at Wally World a while back specifically to corral the 18 different kinds of treats that I had for Hurley.  Dogs need variety too. 

I added some rub-on letters that I found in my scrapbook stash and now it’s super cute!  Don’t ya think?

Treat Container

Have a wonderful Sunday!  I will be enjoying the day with my Honey who got home late last night. 

J

Lists

I’m a list type person.  To-Do Lists, Grocery Lists, and….well….I can’t really think of any more lists that I create.  But I’m a big fan.  Since I’m feeling a little uninspired lately (as far as my blog goes) I think I’m going to rock some lists for a couple days.  Random?  Yes.  Interesting?  No guarantees.  🙂

1.  I watch a lot of HGTV.  I especially love the flipping shows and the property shows.  And if you’re interested in home buying, remodeling, flipping whatever-watch HGTV!  You learn a lot and get to see other people make mistakes.  One thing that always bothers me about the home buying shows is when the buyers are walking through the dining room area and make a comment about the light fixture hanging so low.  “Oh, we’d definitely have to fix that.”  OK, obviously you’re in a dining room.  Where a dining room table would go.  If there’s a table there, you won’t be bumping into the light fixture.  Idiots.

2.  I went shopping yesterday at the Katy Mills mall.  It’s my favorite mall.  I went shopping for two reasons.  I needed a nice dress to wear to a formal wedding in a couple weeks.  I found one!  A really cute one that actually fits and looks nice.  I may post a picture of it later this week.  I paid about $67.00 for it!  More than I would normally pay for any article of clothing.  But it was on sale!  lol.  I was unsuccessful on my hunt for shoes to go with the dress.  I’ve got cave man feet and it’s nearly impossible to find shoes that look cute without making me want to cut my feet off with a dull saw. 

3.  I also bought some stuff for my new job.  I already own a few pieces that would be okay to wear to this new job, but not nearly the amount of things that I really need.  For whatever reason, in my mind I feel like I should have 2 weeks worth of outfits to wear to work.  I want things that I can mix and match so that I can really get a bunch of different outfits out of my stuff.  I found some good stuff today at New York & Company.  That is one of my very favorite places to shop.  I still don’t feel like I have enough pieces, but it’s a good start. 

4.  Another shopping feat that requires a public announcement….*drum roll please*…I BOUGHT A REAL BRA!  Actually I bought 4 real bras.  When I say a ‘real bra’ I mean a bra that isn’t a sports bra.  A bra that actually makes it look like you have 2 boobs instead of a uni-boob.  I spent about $65.00 for four bras, but they are nice and will last me a long time.  I actually had the lady measure me to make sure I was looking for the right size.  I’m a 38 nearly B.  Did you know there were ‘nearly’ sizes?  lol.  So I’m really big around (I have a huge rib cage) and have really small boobs.  The lady picked up some bras for me to try on.  After like 12 bras I finally found a style and size that fit.  It was a “Barely There” brand.  It’s really smooth and silky feeling.  I ended up getting a B size.  After trying on so many bras I discovered that one of my boobs fits perfect in a B cup and the other one fits perfectly in an A cup.  Just freakin’ great.  The B bra that I went with has a little padding (not much!) so it sort of fills in the boob that is lacking.  I’m not sure how comfortable I will feel wearing a real bra.  I like my small boobs and sports bras.  I’ll keep you posted. 

5.  I took a nap yesterday.  All that shopping made me so freakin’ tired!!  I was only going to take an hour nap, but that tuned into a 2 hour nap.  I can’t remember the last time I took a nap.  It was great.  Although I do blame being tired with my new habit of not sleeping in past 10 a.m. on the weekends.  Normally, I’d be in bed till Noon on Sunday.  My body was probably in shock. 

6.  Hurley always jumps over this big chair that we have.  He jumps from one arm to the other.  He was playing around the other day chasing the cat or something and he attempted to jump over the chair, but he missed.  He slammed into the arm and fell down.  He made a shrieking noise and I thought he’d broken his leg.  That whole night and the next morning he was limping around on his leg.  I felt it and moved it around and it felt okay.  I guess he just bruised it.  He’s okay now thank goodness.  Poor baby! 

7.  I got my hair cut on Saturday.  I’ve been trying to grow my hair out for about a year.  It was getting pretty long, but it was also getting unmanageable and drab looking.  No matter how much conditioner I would use it would still take me ten minutes to get it untangled and that usually just involved ripping out my hair.  It’s still long (below my shoulders) but there are some shorter layers.  Having the layers makes it feel lighter and bouncier and will let it dry in probably half the time.  I’m still going to grow it out, but the layers were definitely needed. 

8.  I like brussel sprouts.

9.  T and I both have new cars.  Most new cars come with the tire pressure system.  When one of your tires is low a light will come on on your dash.  That’s great because unlike a responsible driver-I never check my tire pressure.  But the annoying thing is that it doesn’t tell you what tire is low.  So you have to go around and check all your tires to find the one(s) that are low.  Okay so that’s not really a big deal but it would be so much easier if it could let you know which tire is low.  I guess our vehicles aren’t fancy enough. 

10.  My T is coming home very soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Thank god.  Some days it feels like he just left and others it feels like he’s been gone for a year.  I know he’s looking forward to coming home too.  He’s been working everyday and working long hours.  Or at least that’s what he tells me.  He could spend all his time drinking and doing Nigerian hookers for all I know. 

11.  I haven’t colored my hair in quite a few years.  I used to get highlights every once in a while, but I’m not going to color my hair anymore.  Most of the fake blonde highlights are grown out and I’m pleasantly surprised to see that I still have some blonde in my hair.  Coloring your hair is a pain and it costs money.  So I’m not doing it anymore. 

12.  I only have a week and a half left at my current job.  I haven’t told any of the old people and I’m not sure when or how I’m going to do it.  I might write a letter or something or just start telling people I don’t know.  I don’t want them to have a heart attack or start crying uncontrollably.  🙂  They are going to be shocked! 

13.  We’re going to end the list on 13.  Hope you’re not supersticious.  😉

Have a nice Monday-if that’s even possible.  I hate Mondays. 

J

World’s Fastest Destroyer

No, I’m not talking about some military battle ship. 

I’m talking about my 11 pound dog.  He wins the award for “World’s Fastest Destroyer.”  Well, if there was such an award-he would win.   

Congratulations Hurley! 

This little toy went from cute/fluffy lamb to pile of stuffing in 3 minutes flat.  And I thought he didn’t have any talents.  Silly me. 

#1

He looks so proud of himself.  I’m just lucky that he’s sticking to doggy toy destruction and not Julie’s belongings destruction. 

Have a nice Sunday everyone! 

J

Don’t Leave Us!

T is heading back to Nigeria today for another month of hard work.  He was actually scheduled to leave last Sunday, but the trip was rescheduled because of hurricane Gustav.  As you Houstonians know, Gustav didn’t do a thing.  No rain.  Nothing.  Well, it did give the news folk something to talk about all day long. 

But that was perfectly OK with me.  That meant that I got to spend one more week with my love.  It worked out great as we were able to get a lot accomplished in the house hunting area. 

T will be in Nigeria till early October.  When he gets back we may or may not have a new house!  I may or may not have a new job!  And I may or may not be a red head.  Kidding on that last one.  There’s a lot going on right now and it’s sort of an inopportune time for him to be working out of the country.  But it’s all for the money baby.  Boy do I miss him when he’s gone though.  He’s my bff!  My main squeeze.  The butter to my bread.  The apple of my eye. 

*Whew…sorry.  I just threw up a little in my mouth. 

And I’m not the only one around here who gets sad when T is getting ready to leave. 

Look at this face….

Take me with you!

I was helping T ‘re-pack’ his bag today and Hurley got a little upset.  I’m sure that he knew that T was going to be leaving.  I think Hurley is saying, “Don’t leave me Daddy!!”  Yes, T is Hurley’s biological father.  And refers to him as Daddy.  🙂  Hurley claimed his spot in T’s suitcase and I had to snap a picture of his sad little face.  Poor baby. 

Good thing he has the brain of a gnat.  He will probably forget who T is five minutes after he leaves.

See you soon T!  Stay safe!  We love you!!!!

Can I Keep Him?

Puuuuuuhhhhhhhhlllllllleeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzeeeeeeeeee!!!!

That’s what kids say when they find a stray little animal that they want to keep.  And by kids I mean 23 year old females who have an unusual affinity for all non-human living beings. 

I’ve been an animal lover my entire life.  I used to cry because I wanted a horse and never got one.  Horses were my true love.  I will have one or five someday.  And I also have always loved dogs.  I used to attempt to train the dogs that happened to find their way to our farm.  I have had a few dogs myself (before Hurley) that I have loved very much.  I’ll have to do a post or two about them someday. 

I honestly don’t understand why or how it can be that some people don’t like animals.  Did you know this!?  That some people don’t like animals of any kind.  That is just so foreign to me.  I don’t get it.  I can understand if they were possibly mauled by a dog or large salmon or something, but some people have just never liked animals.  What kind of heart do you have if you can resist the sweet kisses of a puppy or kitten?  I know.  A cold, black heart that is made of stone.  Are you one of those people?  How do you live with yourself?  I don’t know…maybe I’m the weird one. 

Growing up on a farm meant that I had a lot of opportunities to be around animals.  Cows, horses (not my own!), dogs, cats, kittens, puppies, calves, wild animals, etc.  I always like to be outside and hanging out with the animals.  I’ve attempted to nurse various animals back to health (bunnies, birds, rejected kittens and so on).  I just can’t bear to see an animal suffering or in danger.  I feel so bad when I see a stray on the side of the road.  I also have an uncanny ability to spot animals.  I can spot hawks in a tree a mile away.  😉  I even feel bad for the pigeons with broken wings that hang around parking lots.  I was a little sad when moving to Houston a year ago.  I knew that I would be in the City.  No wild animals.  Only city folk.  Who don’t enjoy being scratched behind the ears.  And although I don’t get as much animal interaction in the City as I did living in the country, I’m happy to tell you that I’ve been able to pet my fair share of animals.  Unfortunately they haven’t been of the cute and furry type. 

You remember the post I did about a little snakethat I found in the parking lot of our apartment complex.

Man handling this snake was not the smartest thing I’ve ever done. It turned out not to be poisonous, but there are apparently similar looking snakes in this area that are. I was smart enough to pull a Steve Irwin and grab it by the head so it wasn’t able to bite. That was the first time that I had ever captured a snake. Pretty cool. Tasted like chicken.  Kidding.  He was released unharmed.

Then we had this little guyinside our apartment one evening. Geckos, especially this type, are common in Texas. He was climbing on our wall in the kitchen when we spotted him. Geckos have cool little feet that allow them to go anywhere. I captured him and released him back into the wild blue yonder that is our manicured lawn. His name was Jose. He enjoys salsa dancing and long walks on the beach.

And now to introduce you to possibly my favorite little Texas creature. I found this little guy a couple of weeks ago. he was wandering the sidewalks at work. I was on my way back to my office when I spotted him. Remember…my uncanny ability to spot even the smallest animal?

Lewis

 

I knew I couldn’t let him wander the sidewalks.  It was ten million degrees outside and I didn’t want one of the residents to step on him.  Or squash him with their walker.  Or pick him up and attempt to eat him.  Or try to dress him in baby clothes.  They’re an unpredictable group, let me tell ya.  So I picked him up with my jacket and carried him back to my office.  Then I put him in a styrofoam cup and took him home.  I was so excited to show off my find to T and Big A who was here on vacation.  “Look what I got!!!!”  T suddenly got a worried look on his face.  That sentence usually means one of two things.  I’ve either brought home another animal or I’ve spent an ungodly amount of money on something I didn’t need.  It’s usually the animal. 

 

Put me down!

Isn’t he cute!  His little turtle feet had claws.  They weren’t sharp.  Since he was small, I assumed that he was a helpless baby.  I really had no idea…but I assume that all small animals are babies. 

Red-Eared Slider

After a little investigation via the web I’ve determined that Lewis (I name all animals immediately upon meeting them) is in fact a Red-Eared Slider.  See his red ears?  Or the red color where I’m assuming his ears are.  As you can see in the background, Hurley was very interested in this little guy.  He also loves animals.  Especially ones that are small enough to put in his mouth. 

Austin Reptile Service has this to say about his species.  

RED-EARED SLIDER, Trachemys scripta elegans
Red-eared Sliders range across all of Texas except for the far-western region. They are easily identified by the red stripe found just behind the eye. Females can grow to be over 1 foot in length but males are smaller. These turtles are aquatic and feed mostly on plants as adults. While they very seldom venture out on land, they can frequently be seen basking on logs in the sunshine.

I knew it!  I knew that he shouldn’t be out wandering the sidewalks.  He needs water.  How the heck did he end up on the sidewalk?  Maybe he was about to be hawk food when he was dropped.  I have no idea.  Thank god I was there to save him.  After a thorough investigation (checking out his feet, touching his skin, poking at his head to watch him retreat into his shell, and watching him crawl around, and a quick look from Chief……

Chief and Lewis

…I decided to set him free.  In my head though, I had visions of Lewis and I enjoying a beautiful life together.  I could get him a little aquarium and a little bowl of water to swim in and a dish for turtle food whatever that may be.  But I didn’t even ask.  I didn’t ask T if it was OK to keep him.  I knew what the answer would be.  So I spared myself the pain and agony and did what I felt was right for Lewis.  I drove to the swampy area that’s behind our apartment complex and tossed (gently) him into the swamp.  He landed in some really tall grass and I didn’t think that he could move around enough to actually get to the water.  So I climbed in and found him in the grass and then gave him a more vigorous toss and he landed in the water.  I’m assuming that the resident turtles took Lewis into their pack as one of their own.  I bet Lewis is living the high life right now.  Soakin up the rays…suckin down brewskies…throwin bows at the clubs.  Whatever he’s doing I know he’s thankful that I was there to rescue him. 

Or maybe he was brutally dismembered by a hawk or something.

It’s All About Me

Isn’t it always all about me?  And for those of you out there who think the world revolves around you…you’re wrong.  So wrong. 

I’m kidding.  I’m not stuck up and I don’t think the world revolves around me.  I wish it did, but it doesn’t.  But here at PLSF, I think it really is all about me.  Sure I mention others from time to time, but let’s face it.  This is my blog so I like to keep the focus on me.  And how amazing I am. 

I usually write my post the night before I actually publish it and tonite is no different.  Right now it’s Thursday night approximately 10:38 p.m.  OK-so that wasn’t approximate, that was exact.  I want to give you an idea of what’s going on in my tiny apartment at the time of writing this post.  My hunny came home today.  He had been travelling for like 96 hours.  OK, not 96-but a long time.  He spent Wednesday night in a hotel in Georgia due to some delays and he claims that he didn’t sleep.  Earlier in the day he told me that he was really tired.  Jet-lag I guess.  I’m not a world traveller so I don’t know what that’s all about.  When I got home from work at about 5:30 p.m. we chatted for a little bit.  Even though we’ve been away from each other for so long, we didn’t really have anything interesting to say.  Since my ‘No T’ routine has been to exercise almost daily, I thought that maybe he’d want to go for a walk with me.  Nope-and that’s OK because he walks really slowly.  And complains about his knees and the fact that I walk too fast.  So off I went for my power walk and he said that he was going to take a quick nap.  He was conked out before I even had my shoes tied.  45 minutes later I returned.  Exhausted and sweaty.  T was still in a comatose state on the couch.  He had told me not to let him sleep for very long because he’s trying to get his sleep schedule in order.  But I thought a few more minutes wouldn’t hurt.  Needless to say…it’s now 10:46 p.m. and he’s still sleeping.  I even made dinner.  I haven’t made dinner in two months!  OK, so it was one of those meal in a bags and a can of veggies, but that still counts.  I said something sweet like, “Honey-dinners ready!”  I filled my plate and enjoyed my dinner.  His is in the fridge.   After dinner, I cleaned up the kitchen.  I’m wondering if he will sleep all night long.  I have a feeling that he will wake up in a little bit and be mad that I didn’t wake him up earlier.  And it will be my fault that he has jet lag.  I will then have to explain to him that I attempted to wake him up when I got home from my walk.  He did open his eyes.  I assumed this meant he could converse.  Obviously I was wrong. 

“How was your nap honey?”

“I’ll show you the design later.”

“What design?”

“The design I’m working on.”

“HONEY!  What design?  I just asked you how your nap was.”  I emphasized the word nap in case he had it confused with the word design.  They sound similar.  Not.  I think his eyes were closed again by this time.

“Don’t you remember what happened last time I went to sleep?”  I’m not really sure what this meant.  I wasn’t in the same room last time he went to sleep.  So-no.  I don’t remember.

This banter went on for a few more minutes.  I was getting mad and yelling at him trying to explain that I had just asked him how his nap was.  I didn’t care what sort of engineering he was doing in his sleep. 

I gave up and ate dinner.  By myself.  Hmm..that felt strangely as if he wasn’t even there.  I have a feeling that he’s been working a lot lately.  Designing things.  It’s infiltrated his sleep.  He just can’t get away.  Maybe it’s the jet lag.  Or the prescription pills that I found in his backpack. 

So I’m sitting at the computer desk.  The computer has Windows Media Center on it so I can watch and record TV on the computer.  It’s freakin sweet.  I’m watching a show on HGTV.  And I’m typing this post on the laptop.  I’m good at multi-tasking.  Hurley is stalking the cat.  I thought the cat was going nutso a few minutes ago because she was being all weird and chasing what I thought was nothing across the kitchen floor.  I thought she was chasing her shadow.  Until I saw a nasty cochroach (how the hell do you spell that?) cockroach crawl across the floor.  I got up and smacked it with my shoe.  Three times.  T didn’t budge.  I thought I was a hard sleeper.  

I really thought tonite would go a little differently.  I thought maybe we cuddle on the couch and he’d tell me how wonderful I am and how much me missed me and how good I smell.  Maybe would would have enjoyed a dinner out.  Or watched a movie together.  Or talked to each other.  Nope.  Instead I feel like I should check his pulse every hour to be sure he’s still alive. 

OK-back to me.  Since I’ve found myself a few new blog readers in the past couple months I thought this would be a good time to notify you of my writing prowess.  I would like to link to a few (or ten) of my personal fave posts.  Ones that I think my new readers (aka: everyone besides my Mom) may not have read.  Posts that I feel deserve a little more attention than they got when they were initially published.  It’s sort of a round about way to force my readers to well…read.  And hopefully comment.  Because without comments I think about doing bad things.  Like cutting and eating brownies and putting ice cubes down the back of T’s shorts. 

Please take a moment to read these posts.  I think you might like them.  Of course, I’m a little bias.

An oldie but a goody: Defacation Distractions

Another dog post. I’m sorry for not having a life: Ugly Ass Dog

I’m not really super human. I have fears too: Coulrophobia

He thought he was helping, but I just wanted chocolate: Fat Chicks

Just because they’re freakin old doesn’t mean they can be trusted: Bingo Betty

We’re so City: Crack Needles!

Why do I hate that place so much!?: It’s All About Ambiance

You still reading? One more…

Don’t worry- he has a new one!: FAIL!

If you’ve read all of those posts before….thank you! I love you! Let’s make babies. If not….please check them out. You might laugh. No…you will laugh. If you don’t, you have a sucky sense of humor and you should probably go watch Nancy Grace or a documentary on how to kill kittens.

Shoutout to NGIP! Actually it’s more of a shoutback as she is giving me a shoutout (is that 2 words?) on her blog. She’s nice enough to publically mention everyone who puts her blog on their blog roll. I’m banking on her immensly popular blog and the nice little link to PLSF to bring me some more traffic. NGIP: Send them over!!!!!!!! Now!

Happy freakin’ Friday yall!

Sleeping Boy Update: It’s now…11:41 and his skin has officially melded with the faux leather couch. There’s no wake up in site.

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